"Redeemed"

The last few years have been nothing short of a battle. It's been physically, emotionally and mentally exhausting at times. We've survived the unimagineable. Faced financial difficulty, been hurt by the people we thought loved us the most, survived miscarriage, cancer scares, and complicated pregnancies - and somehow our marriage survived, we are stronger than ever and it seems as though we finally made it to the light at the end of the tunnel.

I've spent the majority of the day praying, reflecting and preparing for what lies ahead. I thought back earlier to where we stood this time last year, how afraid we were coming off of Johnny's job loss and both of us starting new ones. In one year we have made it from one end of the spectrum to the other. We have made some amazing friends who have had our backs, believed in us, pushed us, cried with us, prayed with us, and help bring us back to God. Furthermore, I could not be more grateful for Johnny. No matter what the circumstance or how scary things got, he has always stayed strong, always been there when no one else could be found and always always has had my back.What an awesome God I serve. The blessings we have recieved lately have been unimagineable.

It is beyond time for me to let the hurt go. Let the things of my life that have held me back for so long go. Let those who have hurt me and put me down go. It's time to move forward and move on with my life. Time to focus on the things that matter, the people that matter, the ones who truly love me. A song came to mind earlier today that is fitting for my life. I think I've posted it before, but I am posting it again today. It's called "Redeemed" by Big Daddy Weave and it's a beautiful song.

"Seems like all I can see was the struggle
Haunted by ghosts that lived in my past
Bound up in shackles of all my failures
Wondering how long is this gonna last
Then You look at this prisoner and say to me "son
Stop fighting a fight that's already been won"

I am redeemed, You set me free
So I'll shake off theses heavy chains
Wipe away every stain now I'm not who I used to be
I am redeemed

All my life I have been called unworthy
Named by the voice of my shame and regret
But when I hear You whisper, "Child lift up your head"
I remember oh God, You're not done with me yet

I don't have to be the old man inside of me
Cause his day is long dead and gone
I've got a new name, a new life I'm not the same
And a hope that will carry me home"

I know that our lives can't be perfect and never will be perfect. I also know there are many battles ahead but I know that as long as God is with me, I can make it through.